(ART WORK BY EUGENE SVENGOOLIE FAN)
“”Will this be a short or long episode on your blog?” Asked Carolyn.she was hot already, and it was only May–time. It was 86°, and I started thinking, that I would have to start watering my big trees, all around the side of the house or they were going to die this summer – – ALREADY!
“it’s going to be very short,” I replied, looking through the phone book for hardware stores and lots of hose; the type that connected a long way, to get around the side of the house, from the well house. At least I still had a well,that probably still worked. I only tested it a couple of years ago. So, I was ready to start buying hoses and start using the well, and its pump, and delay all the death of my trees..
I decided to stay away from Jerry’s hardware, because they had sold me that large toilet that was crumbling into little pieces.who on earth makes a porcelain toilet, that starts to break off in pieces? Forget Jerry! Forget his hardware!
I started to figure out just how much it was going to cost me, for hose and connectors, and some help doing this. But it was worth it, forget the blackberry bushes, this was more of an emergency! I don’t want all my trees to get FRIED this summer.
“also, I have been hearing,” continued Carolyn, helping herself to cold water. “– That tons and tons of people are moving to Oregon in Eugene, from all over the United States; the whole state is going to get SQUASHED. It’s already got Los Angeles traffic!”
“it’s already got Los Angeles smog also,” I was very annoyed at the idea. “Why does everybody want to rush into one state, until there are millions of people from everywhere else, and they are just as miserable as they were in their original state!? By the time they’re through with Oregon, it’ll look exactly like downtown Los Angeles.”
“we’ve already got the migration of Los Angeles gangs, Los Angeles dope dealers, crime, smog and pollution, and massive amounts of cars and vehicles. You know what I’ve read? States that get like this, get so immovable, nobody could get anywhere,, or travel anywhere! In fact, that’s what happened to Detroit, all the businesses moved away because nobody could go out shopping, or get any place. In other words, it imploded!” I continued.
“I didn’t know that,” said Carolyn. “So is that what we have to expect when this gets so bad no one can move?””let me try to remember, “I continued looking in the catalog of garden supplies. “I seem to remember that in that type of situation, it gets so congested, nobody can get anywhere and the first thing they do is desert all those areas, and go OUT.
“After a certain amount of time, people start to move away.” I continued – “but it takes a long time of misery, before a lot of people realize they want to get out of the congestion and smothering population.for some reason, people don’t move one at a time very much, they seem to move in huge DROVES, like cattle being herded. After all we are a herd species. – And once the herd starts to move away, then they do the same thing they did before. LEAVE.
“But I don’t know,you know that’s hard to predict..” I kept looking at garden furniture. Why would I need garden furniture? “I think it has to reach a state of such misery and disgust, that it’s pretty much unlivable. ” “I guess you could say that’s exactly what’s happening now. Where would you go to if you had to move?”,
“I really have thought about that a lot, and I decided I would go someplace that other people hated, and very few people live there. Kind of like North Dakota or South Dakota, or Nebraska, or someplace with terrible winters – so awful that people didn’t ever move there in huge masses, unless they were Eskimos. And they didn’t care.”
“MICHIGAN! MICHIGAN! SISS – boom–BAH! that is, if I can sell this stupid acreage to a bunch of Californians who are absolutely desperate to move here. MICHIGAN! The state of Michigan is practically EMPTY because there’s no work there at all except for Maytag washing machine company. Something like that, one of those big fat Corporations!and Michigan has terrible weather!really awful winters!” I finished up.
“Don’t you have that friend in Michigan, in St. Joseph?” Asked Carolyn.”yes”, I replied, happily. “I should go and visit her and really look at Michigan as a place to actually live – – because everybody is LEAVING MICHIGAN,, instead of going there. ” “And you say the weather is terrible?” Questioned Carolyn further.
“Yes, but I really don’t know how the prices of places to live are there. You would think that a lot of the prices would go down, since everybody’s left the state.I do know that they still have food growing there, which is good and they still have plenty of water. They just don’t have any employment.”
“I sure would miss you,” said Carolyn, slobbering. “It would be terrible. You’re a native Oregonian and you’d leave the state forever?””I think we should probably go together,” I remarked.” We could get a little house together, and go and see my friend may be too. The only thing is there’s going to be lots of disadvantages also, of things that they don’t have in Michigan, that they have here in Oregon. ” “I can think of one thing right away,,” said Carolyn, snarling.. “Lots of hippies and lots of poor and lots of homeless – didn’t your friends say, it’s really hard on poor people there?”
“I’m having an epiphany,” I continued. “Now that you’ve started that question, I think we should somehow investigate Michigan, what they’ve got there and what they don’t, and I think there are little towns still.” “We don’t have to go there right away,” continued Carolyn warming to the idea. “We can look online and find out lots of stuff about it before hand.”
“I think Michigan would have one advantage,” I mused.. “What’s that,?” Asked Carolyn. “Well, it’s probably not as dumb as GERMANY has been lately. They let in tons and tons of unscreened foreign aliens, and now they have lots of rape gangs, burglars, criminals roaming everywhere, and Europe isn’t safe to vacation in .”
“there are real disadvantages that Michigan has,” I continued, remembering. “There are a lot more black dangerous ghettos.. I know that my friend lives right next to one. They don’t have that stuff in Oregon, which is probably why everybody’s rushing here. One of the main reasons!
“HEY, NO DIVERSITY IN OREGON! It’s all white bread! Ha ha!” Carolyn started laughing. “Yeah,” she said,” I don’t know how we’d handle that. Did you say that lots of people left CALIFORNIA, and came out here for the same reason?””you betcha! Hell, all those Californians left because La Raza and masses of illegal aliens kept Swarming into California! But we have to remember it’s a completely different culture than it is here. I’m not sure we’d like it.”
“I definitely like the idea of living in a very empty state,” continued Carolyn. “I think you’ve really got something there.” “It’s a very severe idea,” I said pondering. We would really have to go there, and do a lot of investigating on it. For example, what are their firearm laws like?” “are you sure you can leave your place, and not have a broken heart?” Continued Carolyn.
“Well,” I replied”yes, I’m not sure. But look at all these dumb Californians they all decided to move here bring all their wealth, and raise all the prices of everything, so people who are working poor can’t live here anymore.! Why would I want to keep living in that?”
We decided to really investigate it, prices of little houses, all the different communities, traffic, prices of everything, and start to talk to my friend in Michigan about whether or not it was a good idea.at the very least, we could stop living in gentrified Oregon, which was starting to turn into gentrified Oregon/Los Angeles/Las Vegas/San Fernando Valley.
And there were advantages about having horrible weather; Michigan would discourage other people from moving there. There really were good things about lots of snow, freezing cold, and being miserable a lot of the winter.– and having dangerous miserable black ghettos that were always on the edge of explosion.
the fact is, living in very popular beautiful comfortable states, was not such a great advantage after all. Mainly, you got all the slackers from other areas, who saw a beautiful state (like Oregon) and really thought it was a good idea to MOVE a large part of the United States there, and wreck it completely.– – which is exactly what they were doing.
(Sandraminadotty, considering a move out of Oregon to Michigan, because the weather is so miserable, it is EMPTY. 🙂 )