(lighthouse over ocean, generalized photo)
I am one of the few people I know, female,who never had any kids sometimes I miss that, most of the time I don’t. I read too many stories in dear Abby, about people having trouble with their kids, grown-up, or kids who never move out once they turn 20. That’s when I really don’t miss not having kids.
in the old days, even before I was born, there were reasons to have kids. They took care of you in your old age, just like you took care of them when they were kids. They worked alongside you, if you had a farm or a business, and they were great help. In those days, FAMILY meant a great deal more than it does now. Kids were considered a great ADVANTAGE. They were necessary to help support the family, to get it through bad times, to keep each other together financially and otherwise.most of all, they gave love and affection and support emotionally – – if you were very lucky.
now, it’s completely the other way around; if you can’t afford to have kids, which is most of the people now in the United States, it is a great disadvantage to have kids. Now during this huge financial debacle, a huge percentage of women are deciding not to have kids at all. Naturally, if you can’t feed them, you shouldn’t have them.
Of course that hasn’t stopped the large majority of Oregonians,and other very poor people in the United States,of a certain class, especially women, from having kids they can’t pay for.– – and it’s especially tempting to them, to have children if they’re not married and have no man.
WOW, I wouldn’t want to be those women’s kids, taking responsibility for what the husband is supposed to be! You can’t get a man, you can’t get a husband, so instead, you have kids so they HAVE to love you!
it’s a whole epidemic in the society of “single moms.” My sister and I talked over the phone, and said to each other, “what is this thing about SINGLE MOMS? What is going on?” And we couldn’t figure it out. It was hard enough to take care of yourself, and make enough money for that, but then having a child without a big breadwinner and you can’t really pay for it!?
So they’re absolutely WERE NOT ANY MEN to marry them?they just weren’t available anymore? I still think that two parents is preferable, especially economically, and otherwise to raising kids. You know how difficult it is raising a child all by yourself specially if you’re a woman?
It’s terrible! I have known all these women, and they all did that, plenty of them couldn’t manage it and lost their kids to foster care.even the ones who kept their kids, had a horrible time financially . Not to mention just RAISING them.the other epidemic that was going on, was divorce, where the wife gets stuck with the kids, and they fight over child support, or the husband runs off and dumps child support completely.
when I was a young woman, I saw all this happening, and I decided just not to have kids if I couldn’t do it properly.even years later, I realized it was a really hard decision to make. But I’m glad I made it. Marriages were too unstable, divorces were hell, and raising kids alone was definitely HELL.
then of course, I saw my friend Marie; her kid, who was 20 years old, was still living at home, not working, and not going to college. This wasn’t the first time; other women I knew, also had 20 or 21 or 22-year-old kids, living at home not working, usually not going to school, and getting their mothers very bad tempered. It also happens with two parents a lot now.go ahead, read dear Abby for a while and you’ll definitely see it.
“did Anthony lose his job again?” I asked Marie over the phone, quietly. ” They fired him?” It was none of my business, but she was babbling about it.ho-hum; now I did know that it was extremely hard,for young people to FIND any jobs, that were not working for McDonald’s hamburgers, or a car wash or a supermarket.(no, most supermarket jobs paid pretty well, leave that out.not all of them.)
but I hit the ceiling, when Marie came over, and really started wailing; it seems that she had helped out a friend, an old friend who used to drug and drink a lot, wound up homeless, and she helped him get his social security disability, and his work pension, and he was supposed to pay her back for legal fees, $7000.she put it all on her credit card, as usual. She always does that, credit card mania.
And now her “supposed old friend”, went out and bought a van to travel around in,and left her with $7000 debt on her cute little credit card, left his rented room, and just VANISHED.he took it on the lam. He took everything he owned with him, any information she could trace him with, and just went back to his old lifestyle.– – not telling anybody where he was, and leaving ALL of his debts behind.I suspected that his ex-wife was never going to get anymore child support either, even though he could now afford it.
so there I have Marie crying like crazy in my kitchen, while I try to make her some tea to calm her down, and I can’t help but say out loud, “Marie, what in hell were you thinking, when you saw your disreputable old friend from the past who ruined his life, and you helped him and racked up your credit card? Why didn’t you just send him off to the mission, or tell him to go to homeless help? You already don’t make enough money! You have a 20-year-old kid, who can’t hold down a job, you have to support, and then you take on this other responsibility?! What in-HELLS name were you thinking?!” I had to be honest, I was too exasperated.
the Credit Card; that national “put– every – single – expense – we – don’t – have – any – money – for, – and – don’t – expect – to – have – money – for, – because – we – just – DON’T – HAVE – MONEY – ANYMORE! –” Lifesaver. Everybody’s using it that way. Slap everything on the credit card, the groceries, the dentist, the car repair, (the taxes?) anything you have to pay for. Main reason, NO REAL MONEY ANYMORE! But since we have a credit card, that doesn’t matter! We can buy it anyway! We can pay for it anyway!
We don’t have to do without, as if we were poor people! People in the past did that, but we don’t have to, we have a perpetual, rotating– money–machine, that we never have to pay off or deal with,at any time!
those of us who have read the novel “Mme. Bovary”, and took it especially to heart,figured out what that Dr.’s wife in France, eons ago, did wrong. She longed for the elegant lifestyle they had no money for, and a sly businessman came to her, and showed her how she could buy all these wonderful things,if she just put it on CREDIT! Never have to pay it off. Which, of course was not true, and led to her swallowing a whole lot of bitter poison, literally, and dying in horrible pain.her doctor husband and her child, lost their home and everything in it, and unfortunately the heartbroken doctor died, leaving the child orphaned.
our whole nation, our government, and ourselves privately had become that orphaned child.we used to call it “robbing Peter to pay Paul”. It’s also called a “Ponzi scheme,” or a “house of cards” along with other names. Maybe financially it’s not EXACTLY built the same as the Ponzi, but pretty close. It’s literal interpretation is, that you can steal and steal and steal and steal money, and never have to pay it back or get caught and sent to debtors prison–
– or lose everything you have, a roof over your head, your car, or lose your COUNTRY in debt. to CHINA, and secretly sell it all off to the Chinese, without telling your countrymen.whereupon, China internally controls your government,your military, and moves all its people into America, in vast amounts.if I were the government, doing this I’d keep it very very quiet and hush-hush, so not to alarm those citizens who still own firearms.
Not that they’re getting fooled anyway.they PRETEND everything is okay.we ALL look at the hideous dangerous news every day, and pretend everything is okay.heroin addicts do that.you just don’t feel a thing, so you keep doing ANYTHING, to get that stuff pumped into your veins.ANYTHING!
however, since Marie was sitting in my kitchen, bothering me with this, I decided I was going to do SOMETHING about it. I took her purse, went through it, until I found her credit card; I got a pair of very sharp scissors from my sewing box, and cut it into very tiny pieces, and threw them in the kitchen garbage.
I also took all the information off of it, and I called up her credit card company, and canceled her card legitimately, pretending to be Marie.. Marie didn’t notice, she was too busy sniffling and feeling sorry for self. democracy sure didn’t work for her; she needed responsible people to tell her what to do, and make her do it. “go tell your dumb kid, Anthony, he’s a big strong young person, go live somewhere else with other young people, and start paying for himself”. I commanded her,in a frugile-Germanic, tone.
I took the cash out of her purse, and stuck it in her hand. “THIS is your money,” I said firmly to Marie. It is not floating up somewhere in a cyber cloud ! THIS is it!see, it’s lousy paper bills, and worthless metal coins. But it’s still considered MONEY,even if it is a bad substitute.and,” I looked at her firmly and angrily, ” THAT is all the money you’ve got!!get that into your head, now, or you’ll end up losing even the roof over your head eventually.” Marie looked at me sadly,but it was my kitchen.my kitchen, my rules.
Marie left finally, and I decided to start up my own “credit – fixer – upper – company”, because, why waste all this valuable advice, and not have people pay for it? The first who should come around, and pay me to advise them, would be the state of Oregon, and the federal government.Heck, even I could run it better at this point !DUMP the whole Federal Reserve! Just get rid of the stupid ass hole! take all those fabulously wealthy, billionaires, way up at the top, who own everything,and run it, and their politicians, and put them in front of a firing squad.
(Sandraminadotty, in Eugene, Oregon, owner and operator of “Sandramina’s Debt-Counseling and Adult-Child Job-Placement Agency”, all rights reserved. Special rates for Banana-Republics-Govts. included. ) 🙂