“CAN PEOPLE CHANGE?” AN ANSWER TO DEAR ABBY”, BY THE KNOW-IT-ALL IN EUGENE, OREGON

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(CRUDE ,CHEAP PAINTING DEPICTING THE FINANCIAL STATE OF BADLY-MANAGED EUGENE)

there are those of us, who consider ourselves smarter than everyone else, more capable, and better at ruling towns, counties, states and countries better than others. In other words, we have very big egos. That pretty much nowadays describes everybody. Everyone thinks they know what to do, more than anyone else. So naturally we have columnists who write on “sex expertise, for gay and straight people” and “relationship and life advice for other people”. It’s bad enough we have to watch amateur TV shows, where some snide person decides you can’t sing, you can’t dance, and throws you off the show.  animal04.gif tedy bearanimal03.gif cutekittyanimal02.gif blakkat

as far as politics, we always select the guy who has the biggest mouth, and promises us the most, and tells us he can do better than anyone else. So, we elect the wrong people! We elect the people who promise us everything! Which of course is impossible. And we don’t want to hear from the other side “I can’t promise you everything, the government is overwhelmed, and we will have to cut a lot of it out, it in order for us to survive.” Somehow Germany did that, which explains why they are in better shape than the rest of the countries in the European union.maybe it’s because they like sauerkraut so well. emo03.gif wild clemenstn1.gif thakgiv

But try telling an American that!the last thing they want to hear is, “you have to start cutting back, you cannot have everything you want,or maybe everything you need, you’re going to have to tighten your belt and be frugal.” Frugal is a word that no one uses anymore, because everyone refuses to try it. In fact, it’s become a bad word, in a nation that desires everything to be possible, even if they can’t afford it, and it will break the government eventually.try electing honest people; it’s not possible, because the public doesn’t WANT honest politicians! They want politicians to tell them exactly what they want to hear!they don’t want to hear, that everything is screwed up, and they’re going to have to go through hell to fix it. fifawm66 053.gif  Old Guy em.

it reminds me of the way that most people approach life; reject reality. Just concentrate on what you want out of it, and that you deserve it, you’re going to get it, nobody’s going to stand in your way. However, life can cut down even Americans, to reality, and give them a really hard time because they’re not listening to it. For example, can you imagine an America where people can’t drive their cars as much as they want to anymore? Because gas is become too expensive? And they’re going to have to CHANGE what they expect, just like Europe has to take lots of public transportation. movie01.gif spaceman sml world

I won’t go into the financial ramifications of such an attitude. That you can BUY anything, and the government won’t fall on your head? That you can spend anything, and you won’t go broke? that business and big financial companies can be as crooked as they like, and no one will ever find out? There will never be any bad results?that EVERYBODY can afford a home? vote09052

So the denial of reality in modern-day life, is something that we understand has been going on for many many centuries, probably back into ancient times. However, I don’t think ancient times handled it exactly that way. Reality tended to  hit solidly in the head, from the time they woke up in the morning, about their status and situation in life, and if you didn’t pay attention to it, you were screwed from the beginning. That didn’t stop the crowds in Rome that wanted bread and circuses and expected them. So we are not the first civilization to screw ourselves up from wanting pink champagne, pixies and fairies, and fairyland, and to print as much money as we like, and still have it actually have any value. People have been doing this all through history. zombie09

But we’re only to speaking here, about the question that came to dear Abby in the newspaper recently. (That I will admit, right away that I am not a sage or genius, and I don’t know how to fix everything. That’s not what I’m saying.) However, it does give you an insight into the ways that society tends to lie to its people, for its own reasons. Somebody writes to” dear Abby:” and says,” dear Abby: do you think people can change?”of course dear Abby automatically says, “I assume you mean, change for the better. The answer is yes, of course people can change. With motivation, determination, and perseverance, people can accomplish almost anything they set their minds to.” vote12052

OH BOY! That last bit was a load of BS! But it’s not unusual, it comes from psychologists and psychiatrists every single day. “Of course you’re going to get better, of course you’re going to get cured or get well.” It’s that “people can accomplish almost anything they set their minds to.” You probably heard something like that from your folks; they probably told you, if they were like mine and like a lot of people’s, “you can be anybody and anything you want to, in life dear!” – – Which sets you up for pretty bad disappointment in life. vote07052.gif shark n ful

just watch that movie “fight club”, with Brad Pitt, and you’ll see what I mean. One of the reasons that the guys in the story, want a fight club, is they are so angry and exasperated, over getting lied to by society about the following message; “work hard, work long hours, do everything you’re supposed to do, be honest, be forthright, and you will eventually become the big boss.” But the characters in the movie have found out just the opposite; not everybody can be the big boss. In fact most people can’t!and careers and life have a lot more limits on them that we are told by society. And the guys in the movie, have to work so hard long hours, doing bull shit, to have fancy credit cards, and lots of credit, and even cars they don’t want, and pickup trucks they don’t want. And they’re very very angry about being lied to all this time.  bek009.gif   firey burning emoticon strip01.gif fight

it is definitely a “THING” of Americans and America, that we are all told, maybe when we graduate from something, “go forth and conquer the world, and succeed and become the divine, make lots of money, become accomplished, and become tops in your career.” Of course nobody mentions that everybody gets told that, and not very many people can do that, there is not really that much room at the top.that’s why there are much fewer billionaires, then there are the rest of us who are poor. happy_bouncing_____gift__by_snowsniffer-d599dec

Maybe people told you,you should not try to make a living off of art; but they don’t tell you the reason WHY. They don’t tell you the reason is, so few people make a living off of a creative job, that one in 6 billion can do it. How about those odds? They really don’t tell you that. You have to find out later, and also find out that statistic.so you take it for granted, they mean that YOU can’t make a living off it, because you’re not good enough! Not the reason. You just assume that and they don’t tell you., Is because almost NOBODY makes a living off of it. And there are trillions and trillions of artists that are good. Look at the web, they’re all over the place.___i_don__t_know____worried_emoticon_by_classyretrogaga-d59a329super_original_hand_crank_by_twoohten-d599zqs

of course, also when we’re young, we don’t want to hear people tell us, we can’t do something. So we go out and try to do it anyway. Instead of looking at the statistics and investigating the facts, we listened to people in art school, and teachers of art, because they want to make money off of our illusions. avelineofunderland_support_sign_by_sugarislife28-d59a9ed

Which leads me to one of the first principles in life everyone should know; “we want to believe the lies we want to be true, not the real truth.”.maybe it sounds cruel, but it’s true. Especially society loves to lie to its members, and its members just lap it up.  evil_smile.gif hoppy

however, very important lying, in very important instances, can really fuck up your life. This is not one of those minor little white lies; like the one above, the politician promising the people in a democracy everything they want, and that nothing is impossible, and the politician is perfectly capable of doing it,   if you elect him, there are insidious ones that society just won’t let go of. 37.gif whitekitty

we’re talking about the one that dear Abby just recited: “yes, of course people can change. With motivation, determination, and perseverance, people can accomplish almost anything they set their minds to.” That is a very particularly American piece of crap.  cute_robot___free_avvie_by_r0se_designs-d4ki7adgif

In the first place, there are certain things about yourself, and about life that are impossible to change. And you have to look at that right now. You cannot change the age that you were born into, the financial and social matrix you were born into, your parents, your family, your talents, and all your physical attributes, including that part of your personality that is inherited from your parents.and it is true now, we’ve found out that personalities, are inherited to a great degree. Some people are just naturally more outgoing, and some people are always going to be more introverted. It goes with the inheritance of family. Some people are good at math, because everybody in their family has that kind of brain.or, everyone in your family is good at poetry or English, or writing. It’s just an inherited talent. Cream_and_Racoongirl_emoticon_by_zimpy222

So if you look at the statement that “of course people can change.” – That has to be explained.and it has to have some reality thrown at it. Changing your self is very very difficult, and very very limited. About the above circumstances, there’s not much you can change. For example, today in America, the statistics say that almost nobody changes their social and financial standing and moves to a higher one anymore. For what ever reasons, most of us are stuck in the one we are born into. We now have social and financial classes that are completely solidified.think of us, as becoming like England. your family comes from chambermaids, you are going to be a chambermaids. Hard to believe, but there it is.Kiwi___the_BIRD_by_Emotikonz

and I can hear you saying, “but what about the exceptions to the rule? Look at Jay Leno.” Yes let’s look at Jay Leno how many of him are there? There’s one.there is also only one David Letterman. And there was only one Johnny Carson. There were not a whole lot of Johnny Carsons, who all made good.I can promise you one thing, that if you want to become Jay Leno, you are going to have to pay a very big price, which involves, doing anything you have to do, no matter what it is, to become him. To have his job. The reason being, there are plenty of other people who would kill their mother, or dump a baby into a garbage pail, just so they could become Jay Leno.It has a VERY big price on it.and there’s no guarantee, that if you pay the price, that you’re going to get the prize after all. There are no guarantees in life.___fight____by_forestsofazarath

so the statement, “with motivation, determination, and perseverance,” does not include the very necessary things of “trickery, crookedness, lying, cheating, bribing, sleeping with, killing, marrying, and licking the boots of whoever you need to, to become the success.” I just love it where she says “people can accomplish almost anything they set their minds to.” Yes, I’m 67 years old, and of course if I go to very good doctors of fertility, I will be able to have a child at my age. I will also be able to strike it rich. I’ll be able to find a man, who’s very sexy and loves me and doesn’t care that I’m old. Not only that, even at this age, and from my bleak start, and the fact that I’m a woman, I can still run for president and become president of the United States.”Lycanthropy_by_Emotikonz

I just love that last one; no other woman who has ever run for her parties vice president or president, has ever been chosen by her political party,  to ever run for president! That’s because they are all run by MAN. MEN! And the one thing they fear, is women getting up in the world, going into politics, and having a chance rule as president. they are already scared to death of us,they won’t let us into very high paid blue-collar union jobs, how the heck do you think we are ever going to become president, unless we women organized, together, and conquered men in the United States, and took over the country!?_happyslap__by_tornadobeast 62.gif starwars fight

Yes, I’m talking about, women would have to make war against men, very effectively, and win, and be dominant over the male sex. That’s what it would take. Too bad we’re not going to do it.the reason that’s the only thing that would work is, that is pretty much the only thing that men understand.that’s how they work with each other, and that’s  how they understand us.the submissive sex, and they are the dominant one.that’s exactly how they all compete, and work with each other, they don’t like to cooperate. They don’t like to work side-by-side, they like to take over.Don__t_Git_In_by_Momma__G

Look at the way they manage all the nations.DOMINATE! Even the UN can’t get over it, they hate the Jews! WHY should they hate the Jews? Because there are lots of Jews influential in Hollywood? Even if that’s true, Hollywood is not the whole world.no, they hate the Jews, and want to destroy them, because they need some small nation, to destroy, because it makes them feel better and look better..also, and I believe this to be true, the largest majority of Jews are pretty intelligent. Let’s face it, most of the world hates intelligent people. They consider us to be an alien species. They can’t do anything about putting up with the huge computer nerds, because they can’t trash them anymore.but boy, if they get a group of physicists in a room, most people are going to feel inferior, and shakefist(1)stupid, so they hate the physicists. “ALL SCIENTISTS ARE EVIL! Don’t believe them! Don’t believe what they say!”

. However we’ve got a long way from dear Abby’s little assertion that “people can change.” Is a very very mistaken, naïve, and a horribly simplistic statement. Try finding out, the statistics for how many alcoholics actually quit drinking. I know that a relative of mine, had the problem and asked their doctor, “what are my chances of quitting drinking?” And the doctor gave them the statistics of alcoholism. It was not good. Very few alcoholics quit _fart__remake_by_arriochdrinking. Most of them don’t. My relative was intelligent enough to go to AA, and do everything they had to, and they quit drinking. But apparently it’s not as common as we think. The relative was in the minority.DON_T_FART_by_Cinyke

just how hard is it actually to change things that you do? We’re not even talking about “changing your self.” Just your behavior. For example,you can tell by now, I am not very good at editing. And I have tried to change that in this blog! Over and over and over! So, am I ever going to be able to change that? I don’t know. For one thing I’m very verbose. When I latch onto a subject I tend to keep going..I even go back over this column, and try to cut out unnecessary things. But even cutting out stuff, I still have too big a column.that may be the reason, most professional novelists have their own editors, which edit their novel before it’s published. They can’t do it themselves.they just can’t cut up stuff and leave it out._fuckthis__by_crakaemotes

the next people you should probably talk to, and a lot of them, are psychiatrists, psychologists, social workers, and therapists. Depending on just how bad off someone is as a client or patient, ask them some of the ratios of change for the better that happen to their patients.if they’re honest with you, they’ll tell you that huge change in eagersomebody that has very extreme bad behavior, or very bad mental or emotional illness,is not very common.

However, it’s very possible that there is SOME CHANGE for the better. At least, there’s a tiny bit of chance. It depends on how strong the person is, and how determined, and even the situation they been born into, as far as how much support they have enabling them to get any better, and of course, how ill they are. Schizophrenics, for example most doctors give up on._mycandy__by_reusdesigns

In fact, personality disorders that are severe or, a lot of psychologists and psychiatrists won’t out right tell their patients, that they’re never going to change it.a lot of very bad personality disorders, especially if there is depression, I read, have about may be at the most 40% chance of getting better. And that’s only personality disorders. We’re not talking about the people who are in prison with very very severe illnesses, taking medication, who were so crazy they murder or are really bad criminals. People who murdered their parents.pedophiles. Rapists. Serial killers. Even regular criminals and crooks have an extremely hard time turning it around, outside, and living straighter lives. Even if they WANT to go straighter. If they have the tools, that helps a lot.Catching_Butterflies_by_spring_sky

It’s also like asking the question, “how many drug addicts can quit taking drugs? Permanently?” That should’ve been tackled by dear Abby, because that’s one of the most difficult of all. Along with personality changes, and other things like, be able to manage stress during your life, or being able to avoid falling into depressions. That’s because our brains are not made for easily being able to evolve, or change. Once we are programmed from very early in life, that is usually it. And then we have to put up with it, or live with it, or, if we can’t change ourselves, try to change, even a little bit, our behavior.stay completely away from the sugar. Stay completely away from women or kids. (Take medication to disable us.) Stay in prison, so we don’t murder anymore. Go to anger management classes, and then, if that doesn’t work, when we lose our temper and do ridiculously horrible things, they’ll put us back in stir again.beethoven_by_angelratdesigns

but changing a personality? dear Abby is being completely naïve and avoiding reality herself. Have you ever even tried to go on a diet successfully? Many people have, and many people have failed. Even if you lose the weight, there is a very high rate of recidivism, gaining all the weight back, including more. That part about “motivation, determination, and perseverance” being able to “accomplish almost anything” is one of the tackiest statements I’ve ever heard.__pyro___by_Tobasko

“almost anything”.well, I’d like to be a very cute baby pig, with wings and fly around._fly__by_KimRaiFan

Talk about dear Abby not facing reality? She was doing okay with “motivation,” because that seems to have a high chance of success, sometimes. But “almost anything”? Can I still have the baby at age 67? And all the other impossible questions I just wrote up  there? Oh, and I’m going to marry one of the Trump family and get filthy rich?and although I’ve had a lot of depression most of my life, I’m going to get rid of all of it by the time I die?

Oh my God, did I just hear the heavens tear apart, burst into flame, and go up in smoke?No_TV_No_Beer_make_Homer_crazy_by_ilaaaria

yes, I did.and I’m going to run for president, and be the first female president in the White House. – – After I make war on all men in the United states, and win, put most of them in chains, and make sure they don’t get out of them.super_smash_emotes_by_ville10-d38ms5r

and recently did I hear the words “hope and change”? – Being batted around, again?the worst of that, being the word “change” when the federal government and the political system is hopelessly gridlocked, and locked into a old refrigerator freezer.fantastic_tard_4_by_MenInASuitcase

Of course there’s room for change! I have plenty of nickels and dimes in my pocket!but what I really need, are $20 bills.I’m just saying, the next time you hear someone say, “OF COURSE people can change” you should determine just what it is you have to change, and just how big a price you’re willing to pay, and even if God will accept the payment or not. Because the next time I hear some politicians say, “hope and change,” I’m going to get out my shotgun, and make him duck.

QUACK! QUACK!! QUACK!.Wot_emotes_by_Droneguard

And you should take Dear Abby with a grain of salt.botherplz

(Sandraminadotty, musing away in lousy, hot, smoggy and damp miserable August weather, where we’re all getting infections,  bronchitus, illnesses from the bad air and allergies, (and the melting Arctic)  where i’ve gained back weight I’ve lost, and forgotten again to brush my bad teeth.  Eugene, oh so sick, oh so dealing with reality!!!HA HA HA HA!! “EUGENE AND REALITY!!!””  NO WAY!!   )  🙂   ..clovis-thecutestcat

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