“IT’S THE END OF THE WORLD! WE CAN EAT BUTTER! – – In Eugene Oregon, even!”

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(extreme textural abstract art: done by private school graduate)

as usual,Carolyn and I were wasting time, trying not to go out, and eat full – fat ice cream with chocolate covering it. We were trying to lose weight as usual, and not being able to do it. We were on low-fat diets, high in fruits and vegetables, and water. Yes, WATER. Even though, for some reason, a guy on the radio said the other day that organic nutritionists have decided that water is “a living being”.

this being Eugene, I should not be surprised at weirdness. But somebody here saying that “water is a living being” is extremely radical. That means we can’t drink water. (???) We already can’t eat red meat or animals, or doughnuts, or spaghetti,or flesh, or fat, or sugar or wine or alcohol, or anything really really good.very fattening CHEESE. The type that so melting, and GUI.  Limburger cheese, although delectable, is also not allowed. And it’s not the stinky smell, it’s the FAT. Sigh.

but I caught a hint of a title, off of the time magazine for June 2014, when we went out to find some really delicious low-fat water, and it said something like “Butter is okay!” – – and I turned back on a dime, and grabbed the magazine. “Butter is okay?” I was shaking uncontrollably! The French were right after all! All those goodies were good for us, and we should be invaded by the French and taken over – – immediately!and they should bring all their butter with them!

Carolyn and I rapidly vacuum through the article, not bothering to buy the magazine, and it turns out that new research is saying that “saturated fat is not the reason people get fat.” I’ve known that for years; “lots of carbohydrates, starch, pasta, sugar and white sugar, and sweeteners and processed food are what make all of us fat.and all the high fructose corn syrup, does that, and all the diet “Snackwells” cookies, and all the diet cake and pie and low-fat cookies and goodies.”

in other words, tons of CALORIES, derived from sugars.

I could’ve told them that! As for an excess of sugar and starch making you fat, I also knew that years ago! So did Weight Watchers!as for red meat not being the culprit for heart attacks, I could’ve told them that also. My mom loved to cook roasts, either pork or beef, when I was a kid and they were fantastically delicious and good for you. And the fat was scrumptious! You just didn’t eat tons of it all the time. “Everything in moderation”, as the Swiss say..

 that’s one thing about Americans; they just don’t know what the word MODERATION means .if they find out something is bad, they do too much of it. And if they find out something is good they also do too much of it so it  later turns bad.(okay, have you noticed all the little miniature computers everywhere in people’s hands and purses, and wallets, cell phones,and every blooming place they can stick them? TOO MANY COMPUTERS!)

as we are gearing up, Carolyn and I, to find a good restaurant that has lots of red meat, and something buttery for dessert, I’m thinking to myself “one computer is okay; a dozen is too much.” One should be enough for anyone, unless you are a severe techie, and then they’re all going to rot your mind inside out eventually. Don’t laugh! In my past job, I saw a lot of computer wizards who made computer systems, wind up in mental institutions, halfway houses for the mentally insane, and places like that. And they didn’t get out of them either, usually.they also had a section of them, that tended to be extremely autistic, and an inability  to get along in the world with people.,

but I am distracting myself from the subject at hand; we had bought the RG newspaper, and we decided to go to a really great well-known steakhouse, that had fabulous desserts also. Pastries especially.we wanted to find out what was on TV later, so we could space out from all the wonderful calories. And there, on the cover of the daily newspaper, was the title “University of Oregon plans to split from state, and become private”. And in it, they said that yes, the university was pissed off at being stuck with this state of Oregon,, and had decided to go private, and ask for billions of dollars from Richie Rich investors. (That was the only way they could go private;become Harvard.)

Carolyn didn’t much care what ever they did, as long as they stayed away from her; as she applied steak sauce to her fabulously large, and rare steak, asperagras and baked potato, with butter, she remarked” I really don’t care if they go private; none of the Oregonians can go there anyway they’re too expensive. Go ahead and go private, and then Eugene and this County can charge them a ton of money for just sitting on our state, and every single service they buy from us. They can probably TAX the heck out of them; can’t they? A private school is really different than a state run and owned school.”

I myself was hitting a medium rare fabulous steak myself, with soy sauce (I’ll explain that one someday) and swooning over my baked potato with sour cream.who needs butter when you have sour cream?”there’s just one thing,” I said munching, crunching, and sloshing, “can they still use the name “University of Oregon” if they are NOT THE University of Oregon anymore? In other words, maybe they have to get a private name? Why should the state of Oregon let them have their old name? They’re not legally THE University of Oregon  if they go private!I bet the state could even make them pay a huge sum to keep the name.”

“I bet you would have to consult an attorney,”replied Carolyn in between ecstatic munching. “I really don’t know. Yeah, look it up if there’s any law on the web or just go ask some stupid damn attorney, if you can get one of them to talk in plain English.as for the university wanting to go private, – –”

“– –you don’t seem too upset about it,” Carolyn said, sipping some water. “After all that’s your Alma  Mater.” I replied, “I’m not upset about it. I can always tell people later on, I went to a private school! Ha ha ha!” “– – When it wasn’t private,” giggled Carolyn happily. “Listen,” I said, “that place was so damn hippie run, and ultra terror – SDS – driven, and left-wing and revolting and rebelling, and throw in some more hippies, during the 60s,I never liked the place anyhow. The only good thing about it was the student union was nice, and they had bowling and table tennis in the basement. Oh, and the canoeing on the canal was really nice. Extra nice. And the pioneer cemetery was fabulous, we used to go there and do watercolor.”

In other words, the PHYSICAL PLACE was very nice. But as for the education? CRAP. It never got me a job in all my lifetime. I may as well have just gone out and worked right after high school.no diff. “And I was never one of those top drawer superduper athletes they are paying for , now ,either.the only thing anybody cares about that university now, here, is their athletics – – PRO athletics. Win! WIN! WIN! Never mind how you play the game it’s whether you win or lose!” chop chop chop chop munch munch munch munch; “you can say that again, remarked a getting full Carolyn; “don’t bother to talk to me, if you’re a loser, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha YUCK!”

Really, all that false idealistic truck and muck that people pretended was true..”you should marry for love, not money.” “The really important thing in life is your personal relationships.” And my  favorite, “money cannot buy happiness.” Which might be true, but it sure can put a long-term mortgage with extra frills on it! 🙂  🙂

(SANDRAminadotty, and Caroline,raging out on red meat, sour cream on baked potato, and whipped cream and butter– pastry for dessert with a little bit of really really fat ice cream on it.)

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About WhatToDoWhileThePlanetDies

Eugene,Oregon,home of the U. of Oregon,is a dissolute,gay,hippie,broke, jobless, crime and drug-ridden courupt little no-account town, bulging with fleeing Californicators, who have pushed the natives out,done to Oregon what they did to cali; trashed it. the horrible grid-lock traffic, smog,bad freeways full of accidents have turned it into decayed Detroit.Everyone is broke, there are no jobs,it's left-wing extreme-fanatic crazy, and there are constant political conflicts.Oppression and stifiling city hall crooks fleece the citizens of taxes, it;s the Macon Georgia of the pacific northwest.Anyone who can, leaves.Landowners can't sell, they're stuck.Even the Nazi party would call it Hell.Willamette Valley has the worst pollen,smog,allergies, in the world.Nature and Man are out to get you here, welcome to Oregon!The trash-heap of the United States!

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