(tiny, bad, portrait of owners Cat)
Oh well, here I am, writing my own eulogy. I found out, too late, I have a serious bad blood pressure problem, wound up in the hospital for at least three days, and then was ordered by my doctor not to go on vacation or fly. Stay home and stay in bed and don’t do anything.try and get used to the new blood pressure medication, and don’t die yet.
.okay, I understand the part about “stay in bed”and “take your medication” and “don’t get upset,” and “don’t fly anywhere or go anywhere or take a vacation” and also “don’t get your blood pressure up and don’t have a heart attack or a stroke yet!” I understand all that. I just don’t know how to do it.
they tell you, to do all this stuff, but they don’t tell you HOW TO DO IT. If you tell me, “don’t shoot yourself in the head,” I understand that. I put the gun down. But how do I put down the high blood pressure, redo all my arteries and vascular system, and the hole in my heart, and also my entire family history of high blood pressure and strokes and heart attacks? EASY. Just ignore it.in the meantime, I notice in the paper that the city and County Council, locally, has decided to take five blocks downtown, on Williamette Street, a main thoroughfare, and hack the hell out of it, get all the vehicles off, and make wonderful multiple BICYCLE LANES, for thousands and thousands of dollars, paid by the taxpayers. WONDERFUL! Now all we boomers can take our little bicycles, and have our strokes and our heart attacks downtown on Williamette Street! Because there won’t be any cars, or any customers for businesses, but there will be plenty of bicycles. ….
“BICYCLE RIDERS TAKE OVER ALL LANES DOWNTOWN, ABOUT TIME!!–yells the broke, unread, stupid little local newspaper. – As it fires more employees. At least, they fire all the employees in cars.or anybody who sides with them. Count me in..don’t get me wrong, I had a wonderful heavy, one speed bright blue bicycle as a kid and a teenager here, and I took it everywhere. River Loop one, River loop two, you name it.but that was when I still had FEET. Now I have very old FEET, they hurt like hell, the fibromyalgia hurts like hell, I have to take Valium for it (??) As my sister does, I have a bad back with osteoporosis in it, and everything else you can name. Especially joints..AND, I’ve bicycled all over the city as an adult; I took modern dance. And I took yoga actively for years, bending myself like a pretzel. I ate healthily. I washed my weight. All of that!And what did I wind up with?
BUT most of the time, I feel like I AM ALREADY!
SO, you little bicycle idiots, RUN your little 10 speeds, take over the streets, gang up in big bicycle gangs, and wheel your little hearts out! Have fun while you’re young.BECAUSE once you get old, your bones will dissolve, your feet will get bad, your joints will disintegrate, and you’ll get fat fat fat and you won’t be able to lose it.– –and everybody will hate you for fucking up Williamette Street downtown!
(Sandraminadotty, in Eugene, Oregon, Lane County, and please “LEAVE WILLIAMETTE STREET THE FUCKING HELL ALONE, PLANNING DEPT.!!! – MAYOR! COUNCIL! You dirty CROOKS!” – – HEH HEH HEH! – – oh my, I guess that was a local taxpayers group, handing out those pamphlets! aren’t they naughty?! – – in Eugene Oregon. )