“I LOVE A BURACRACY! IT’S SO AMERICAN!!”IN EUGENE. OREGON

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 “PORTRAIT OF THE US FEDERAL GOVT.”

it was a bright and sunshiny day, ridiculously hot for Oregon, unseasonably hot for Oregon; and us in a 10 year drought. Wonderful! NO MORE RAIN. It used to rain 10 months out of the year; now we’re lucky if we get enough water during the year for the farmers to grow crops. Talk about “world climate change”; Oregon is one of the biggest examples of it.

Oh well, it doesn’t matter, nature is going to do what it wants, and nobody is going to stop PEOPLE either, so welcome to the new world of world climate change, screwing around with every single state in the US, getting rid of crops, and water supplies, and getting us ready for extinction. Or, at least a lot of starvation and thirst.

I’m glad I’m pretty old, and I refuse to be reincarnated and come back to this dump. God can go screw himself! Sorry for all the nasty God hating epithets. I have to go talk to the online Lubavitcher Hasidic Rebbe, who has his own website, and thinks he has all the answers. It’s fun to argue with him, denigrate his beliefs about death, and give him a bad time. He ought to be able to handle it, he’s a rebbe.he’s got a guaranteed insurance policy from God, so he shouldn’t be afraid to argue with me.anyway….

I just found out from another friend, who has a serious depression illness, and has been going to Lane County mental health Department, for some years, to see a therapist, that he has once again been dumped unceremoniously, by his therapist, without any warning. Or, with little warning. He’s been seriously ill with depression for years, and going there, and I guess this is the second time a therapist there has suddenly dumped him, and not referred him to any other therapist. This is very strange sounding to me.I mean, no wonder he’s depressed!

I talked to him recently on the phone; “I don’t understand,” I asked him, “how can they just dump you like that? Are you paying them something?” “Yes, I’m just giving them Medicare,” he said. “So isn’t that supposed to cover it?” “Yes, but that department of Lane County, mental health, has been getting flakier and more irresponsible, as the years went by. Well, maybe they were from the beginning. They were always NICE and caring, but I guess it didn’t go far enough. They weren’t nice and caring enough to refer me to someone else, before they dumped me.”

“yes, but if you’re paying them at least Medicare,” I said, “isn’t that some kind of fraud? Or, isn’t it some kind of NEGLECT or ABUSE of patients?” “You’ve been listening to Obama too much, honey,” he remarked, ironically “Obama says that he’s going to fix Medicare fraud, or misuse of funds,; but anyhow, he just took $700 billion out of Medicare providers, so you can’t find any MEDICAL PEOPLE to accept Medicare! They don’t get paid anything anymore!” I thought about that for a minute.

“So, is Obama himself some kind of Medicare abuse? In a way?” I said finally. “Ha ha ha, that’s a good one!” My friend laughed too hard “you got it right on the head!”

But then I reflected “but since he’s the president, isn’t it impossible for him to do fraud or abuse to Medicare! I mean, after all he’s the CAPT. of the SHIP of STATE! He must know what he’s doing, steering us through the stormy seas of economic disaster! Let’s face it, he’s the captain! Isn’t he? “Oh, Capt.! my Capt.!” Like the poem?”

“it’s more accurate to say that he’s the captain of the Titanic, and doesn’t know the hell what he’s doing while the ship goes down,” returned my friend, gloomily. “And he doesn’t have to go down with the ship, like everybody else, if he doesn’t want to; he can always disguise himself as a WOMAN, and sneak onto one of the lifeboats.”he continued, “besides, he doesn’t OWN the ship! All he did was crash it and sink it!”

I realized why my friend was making that allusion to “disguise himself as a woman”, but I ignored it. That was probably just a rumor, after all the guy had a wife and several kids. So how could he be? Forget it. “So what are you going to do about getting a therapist?” I finally asked my friend. “I’m going to try and find somebody outside of the mental health department, a private practitioner, that takes Medicare”, he replied.

“Happy hunting! Play hell trying to pay for or get somebody to take government insurance who’s a shrink! The last people on earth who want to take Medicare, are SHRINKS. Or, any government medical insurance at all.”he sighed loudly. “I know, I know, I’ve thought of just going to Alcoholics Anonymous, for the therapy, but I don’t have a drinking problem. However, maybe the 12 step program would work on me, rather than another shrink. At least it’s free. That I can afford.”

“Maybe you could develop a drinking problem, so you could go there; and I hear that a lot of alcoholics get their condition treated as a DISABILITY, so you might be able to get some therapy if you became an alcoholic! Alcoholics have an addiction, so they are entitled to disability and therapy for it!all the medical and government community, treats alcohol addiction before anything else, so if you’re only screwed up mentally, with PTSD, and depression, it would be a lot more practical to be, a PRACTICING ALCOHOLIC, and you could finally get some God damn treatment. I would seriously consider doing that.”.

he considered that for a moment; “you know, you really have a point there. They don’t consider me really ill, unless I’ve got a serious addiction; it would be better than trying to become a DRUG ADDICT, because the tell the truth, if I tried that, I might like it too much to quit. It’s supposed to be an excellent escape vehicle. Ha ha Ha.”

“You know, “cocaine, cocaine/running around/my brain!” No, I guess I better try being an alcoholic, some of those drugs, like ecstasy? Ecstasy is really supposed to be ECSTASY; what idiot in his right mind WOULD WANT TO STOP DOING that? So what if you get sick afterwords? That’s a little teeny bit to pay for a trip to ECSTASY.I mean, all I do is get depressed, now, and get panic attacks, migraines, why the hell didn’t I consider going the really great way, and getting addicted to drugs? At least it would be fun for a while before I had to get off!”he hesitated; “and maybe I’d decide NOT to get off them!”

our little talk was making things worse, it seemed.we had gone from trying to find him a new therapist, to entering the possibility of becoming a drug addict, just so he could get therapy. And, maybe not quitting the drug, because, quite frankly, there are REAL REASONS why people nowadays get addicted; the world out there is pretty nasty, cold, isolated, and hard to survive. Not only that, if you start out badly in life with a cold, nasty, abusive family, the world is going to look even worse to you, like “days of Wine and roses” – nasty and ugly.

But we have gotten off the subject of “how to get the stupid government or social services to help him get a therapist;” still, the idea of becoming an alcoholic and getting a better chance of getting therapy for it, was still the best idea.

There was no way to refute the fact that, people who have serious drug or alcohol addictions, get first choice about getting support and therapy for it. After all, it’s “AA, Alcoholics Anonymous,” not “PTSDA, PTSD survivors anonymous”.

and also “AlANON” or “narc anon” narcotics anonymous, support groups.”

SHEESH! Why the hell isn’t there a “Seriously– Fucked– Up– Mentally– anonymous” support groups and serious official government and social services supported therapy programs?is it because we take alcoholics so seriously?

I mean, they really get in your way, throw up all over,crash their cars into you, ruin families, abuse their kids and wife, drink during work hours, and pour more money into alcohol industry, then the biggest company Christmas parties! you have to take somebody seriously, who creates all that harm and mayhem!  gets all that public attention! Gets all that physical harm, DTs, liver damage, repetitive rehab, and dramatic public protestations of WHOOPIE in bars, business conventions,football games, alumni celebrations, , and company client-dinners on the company charge-card.

I mean, those alcoholics really have it made! They get more attention, and concern, and do more harm, to themselves and everybody else, and make a bigger impression on the health industry and the government and the car industry, not to mention all the angry mothers, then any poor little depressed character with PTSD!

and as far as alcoholics and cars, I guess Toyota, Cadillac, motor city, the Ford company, and Mercedes-Benz could just about cleanup with the amount of alcoholic auto crashes and murders that they cause! Those alcoholics are really IMPORTANT PEOPLE.no wonder they get all that therapy and support! Talk about blackmail! If you don’t give them therapy and support, they just keep on drinking, and keep on clobbering the world around them!

And I haven’t even considered how serious drug addicts, elicit government and medical support, to get them the hell off of drugs! Think about what drug addicts actually do; they steal your money, they burglarize you, they mug you, they steal your car, they break into your house or apartment, and murder you for the jewelry you wear! Any harmful thing they can think of to get money for drugs!

Boy, if you didn’t give these guys therapy and support and programs, they probably kill you all off while they are out having a good time, on drugs!but what can a bunch of seriously depressed people with PTSD do to you? Not much.

They’re not going to run cars into you, run over your kids, breaking into your apartment and steal everything, or go around breaking into liquor stores, swiping every whiskey bottle you have!

let’s face it, mentally ill people are just not THREATENING and HARMFUL enough! They just don’t put up a MENACING and seriously DANGEROUS threat to society! All they do is go out and become homeless, and run out of food.or, if they’re horribly clinically depressed, they actually KILL THEMSELVES, and NOT you, or your FAMILY!

The only people they hurt are THEMSELVES.of course, we get the occasional “Columbine group” or the “technical college – crazy – shoot them up”, but nobody takes them seriously enough to think that the reason they’re doing it, is, they are really CRAZY and HARMFUL.

so, people still throw all that money and treatment and support, at alcoholics and drug addicts, and keep ignoring the fact that some really bad off looney, could do the same thing; go out and get a colt 45, or sawed-off shotgun, or just a very sharp knife, and be just as harmful and dangerous as any bad alcoholic behind a car or a stupid drug addict.

however all those alcoholics and drug addicts, usually are EMPLOYED or WORKING PEOPLE, and they could be you or me, still hold down a job, and be as polluted or drugged – out as anything.WORKING PEOPLE who drink like crazy, and drug like nuts, often still hold down a job well they’re doing it. They are PART of WORKING SOCIETY, and not worthless riffraff mentally ill.    HAH!

I think that is it. Maybe that’s why the Alkies and the druggies get so much respect! Plus, when you stop and think of it, they are buying all those DRUGS, and ALCOHOL, and they are supporting industry!Ho boy. And mentally ill people were depressed, or have PTSD, are just sitting at home only supporting PFIZER and nothing more.

“I think you’re correct,” I finally said to my friend, after thinking about all this;” I think you could probably develop a pretty good alcoholic habit, if you really tried. Is there any type of alcohol or liquor you’re especially fond of?”

“I don’t think I’ve ever tried Cognac, or Armagnac, which are supposed to be pretty good. And I haven’t had much brandy. You know, the really classy stuff. I suppose I could develop a thing for those cute little fluffy drinks, with little umbrellas, and that Brazilian mixed drink, what is it? I can’t pronounce it it starts with a “c”, and it’s made with white rum made from cane sugar. It kind of sounds yummy; they crush fresh lime into sugar and ice, and get it really flavorful, and then they add that white rum. Lots of ice; cold and intoxicating. Even expert food people, seem to like them, I read about it.”

“you keep drinking those, and you really either get really happy, or you wind up in AA, still very happy because it hasn’t worn off yet. They’re supposed to be absolutely DELICIOUS. Enough to make me want to go to Brazil right now!” The noise over the phone, sounded like my friend seriously packing, grabbing clothes, etc.; was he seriously considering the trip? Did he even know Spanish or Portuguese?

“Hey,” I yelled into the telephone, hoping to get his ear still, before he left “what are you doing? Are you sure you have enough money to go to Brazil?” He whispered into the telephone, happily” don’t worry, I have a relative, I can steal a lot of money from, before I go, and they’ll never miss it. They think I’m a very nice polite depressed and honest person who would never do anything like that.

“But once I become a serious alcoholic, all that goes out the window. I mean, after all, I would be an ADDICT, you know? Not responsible for what I do?because I’m strung out on booze, or drugs? And I’m not responsible for that? It’s a disease! And I intend to enjoy it first, before I have to give it up!” He chuckled, wildly, and I had a feeling he actually was going to go to Brazil, because the drinks sounded very good, and the weather, even the prices were better; and I guess that white rum made from sugarcane was getting intriguing. It sure sounded a lot better than being DEPRESSED and ANXIOUS, and supporting  ass-hole Pfizer.

And when he came back, he could get into real society, and support Jim Beam instead..or, wild turkey. What ever. The legitimate stuff. The important stuff.

“hey,” were his closing lines over the phone, “don’t worry, I’ll send you a postcard, maybe a lot of postcards! I’ll keep in touch!” “Okay, just be careful, watch out for those airline security lines, and all those creepy people who get paid to feel you up, and ruin your luggage, and refuse to let you go through with a nail clipper or your prescription medication – or even a little makeup. I hate those people; I hate that stupid superduper x-ray machine, that probably gives you eventual cancer.” I didn’t want to explain further, that was why I took the Amtrak everywhere.

He promised to contact me as soon as he nestled down in Brazil, found a nice hotel, that didn’t make him sick with the food or water, and started slurping up that white rum. It kind of made me thirsty just thinking about it.or maybe it was just the idea of liquid sugar cane. And then he was gone, out the door.

Well, at least we had him on the right track; when he came back, eventually he could go to some kind of rehab, instead of getting dumped around by some sleazy mental health Department,and his alcoholism would be treated seriously as a hazard to society and everybody around him – unlike stupid, moronic, and smalltime depression or mental illness. You know, those pathetic people. And the way they get treated, like pathetic.

When dealing with bureaucracy,the health industry, societies support system, and what game to play, it was good to finally know the rules, and follow them. Don’t have the wrong affliction; figure out which one gets you the most support, therapy, attention, and is a important threat to society. He could always be depressed later, when he was in rehab, and getting off all that wonderful white rum!

I thought about it seriously, as I nursed my coffee; was there anyway I could introduce coffee as a serious addictive, dangerous and threatening to society beverage? Any way? Could we say that espresso was dangerous, and could get you so hyped up, you ran your car over your neighbors kids? Did anybody ever get that caffeinated? Maybe I should go to Starbucks, and ask them; “just how caffeinated do your most serious coffee drinkers and espresso drinkers get? Are they a serious threat to society, and to industry, and do they get really NUTS and run you over with a car?does it ever lead to COCAINE sniffing? Or does it just stay with “chocolate espresso bean” – chomping?”

I mean, CHOCOLATE could be looked at, as a really disastrous addictive substance! People really got hooked on that! Unfortunately, they didn’t get threatening, they just got really happy, AND FAT.there was no “chocolate eaters anonymous”, but there sure should be! It would be so great, to get off a major bender, and going to rehab, so happy and so chocolate–ated!

(Sincerely, and most chocolatey, your most addictive and pleasant Sandraminadotty in Eugene, Oregon, the new Arizona of the Pacific Northwest) 🙂

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  1. Pingback: “I LOVE A BURACRACY! IT’S SO AMERICAN!!”IN EUGENE. OREGON | WHATTODOWHILETHEPLANETDIES"

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